Wedding Etiquette Questions: Ask the Etiquist

How many people can the brides' family invite to the rehearsal dinner?

Q. My son is getting married in May and I just received a email from the brides mother informing me that she has 87 people on the list for the rehearsal dinner.

The wedding party if VERY small, just my son's brother and the bride's sister. The wedding invitation list is over 300.

Is this a larger than normal number for a rehearsal dinner? I have not added in any of my family that I would like to invite so I probably have 15 or 16 on my list is all! The wedding is in Austin, only the brides family lives there, EVERYONE else is from out of town.

A. With only 2 wedding attendants, over 100 guests for the rehearsal dinner seems rather many.

Typically, the invitees should include:

Parents
Grandparents
Bridal Party (and their spouses/fiances/or equivalent if budget allows)
Officiant
Flower Girl/Ring Bearer (if old enough to udnerstant) and their parents
Optional: organist if you know the person well; wedding coordinator

If you have the budget for it, it is also considerate to invite guests who are in from out of town who may have nothing else to do that night. Traditionally, other wedding guests that live locally are not included in the rehearsal dinner (unless they have a special role in the wedding, such as reading or performing).

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